"...I desperately need you."
That's a line from the Owl City song, "Meteor Shower." It's been playing in my head a lot lately, because it's becoming increasingly relevant to me.
Okay, so in my last journal, I mentioned how Dad's health wasn't looking good. Well, since then, he's had another scan. The growths in his abdomen are still continuing their slow disappearance, Thank God Almighty. The spots that showed up in his lungs, which lit up in the scan like cancer, have not grown one bit since they first appeared, Thank God Almighty, and the other spots proved to be some kind of infection cleared up by medication, Thank God Almighty.
Now there's a problem of a different sort.
I've been told this came about because Missouri didn't sign on with the Obamacare thing. I don't know if that's true, and I don't want to get in a whole political thing here, but it makes sense with what's going on. Some kind of audit was ordered by the Feds and Missouri was found wanting, so a LOT of people are losing things like medicare and veteran's benefits. One person I know who's lost healthcare is my neighbor. His wife was almost killed in a car accident, and her mother was killed (the woman who.caused it got off scot free, but that's another matter), and she's only recently regained the ability to walk. They have at least three kids at home, and they lost health care.
My parents got hit, too.
Not by a car, but by this ridiculous bureaucratic asteroid. Mom shattered her leg back in april, and had to stay in a nursing home for physical therapy and rehab. Missouri decided to cut her Medicaid (or Medicare, I forget the difference) so we've had to bring her home and do her PT ourselves, and we're stuck paying a bill of several thousand dollars, because the state not only cut her off, but rescinded any payments they made to the nursing home.
And then there's Dad. His healthcare has been cut off, as has his disability and Veteran's pension. Not only has the VA cut him off, they want back the money they claim they paid him, even though the amount they want is over 20 thousand more than he received. They want payments of over $2000 a month, when this money simply does not exist.
Maybe he did make some mistakes, but no one ever said anything about what would violate some kind of rule, and any mistakes he made were at the advisement of a man who has SINCE BEEN FIRED FOR GIVING PEOPLE INCORRECT INFORMATION AND BAD ADVICE.
We're doing everything we can to stay afloat, but this is all just too much, too big. I have been desperately clinging to my faith, praying and putting all my trust in God. It's just, no matter how tightly you cling to the rock, when the waves just keep hitting you, over and over and over and over again, the tightest grips will lose purchase.
I know there are people who deal with terrible struggles every day, things that make even our problems look like nothing. And I thank God every day for the many blessings He has given me and my family. I guess I'm asking that any who read this say a prayer for my family, and maybe for me, that we survive this ordeal, and that those in power, those who hold the fates of ordinary people in their hands, be visited by His Holy Spirit, and be suffused with kindness, compassion, understanding and fair-mindedness.
And also, to any who read this, I ask you to tell those in your life you love them, and to thank God--however you decide to perceive Him--for all the blessings in your life: from the luxuries we've come to think of as necessities, to the basics of knowing where your next meal is coming from, or having clean water to drink.
I'm gonna go ahead and tie this off. Thanks for listening.